So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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