i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
