is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
