don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
