I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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