Your dad touched me again.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I had to cum in my sink.
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