This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
These tits shall not be calmed
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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