Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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