Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
