Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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