New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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