You're completely useless in the revolution.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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