she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
That accounts for only three of the penises
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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