You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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