yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize