her vagine was all disorganized.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
