goodnight i made you a song goodbye
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize