Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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