I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
