How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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