did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
