OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
