East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize