I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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