You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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