Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize