You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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