I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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