forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
