We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Randomize
