so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
