nut hugger
if you like me you must not know who I am
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
