your room smells of hookers.
And success
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize