How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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