dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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