He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
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