I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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