I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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