im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
