Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Dignity is for republicans.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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