apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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