I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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