we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
