i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My pussy is not your playground.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
