btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize