Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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