Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
