I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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