the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
