Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
