My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
